Thursday, October 3, 2013


I don't know why I do, but I hold onto hurts. 

[some people seem to have such an easy time of letting go of them]

It's not like I'm sitting here daily holding onto my grudges like a pet rock.

It's usually when the same people hurt me again and again.

It's like I take the rocks, I put them in my little pail, and then when they hurt me again I pick up the pail.... put another rock in and them dump them out to play with.

Sometimes I just look at them.

Sometimes I throw them. Like Jenny does to her old house in Forrest Gump.
[and Forrest aptly says, "sometimes there just aren't enough rocks].

On rare occasion I sit there seeing all the pails and just cry. Why do I have so many?

I used to collect rocks, actually. All the really nice, polished ones. My parents and grandparents would actually buy me a pretty rock in a gift shop if they saw one. I had a box of labeled gemstones. And a bracelet.

I'm not even sure where those are.

But I need to take my pail of rocks and polish into shiny stones. Polish the hurt out of them. 

Until all I have is a collection of "whatever is true, whatever is honor, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. what you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you." [Philippians 4:8-9]

I feel like that's almost cliché. But just enough truth to not be entirely cliché. 

I guess I better get started then...

How to Polish Rocks
1. Take a clean, empty plastic jar (like a mayo jar, plastic not glass) and fill it with 1/3 of a cup of sand.
2. Slowly, add water to the jar until there is a little more water than sand.
3. Put in your rocksDon't put in too many rocks; leave plenty of room in the jar.
4. Screw the lid on to jar until it's tightTake some duct tape and place it around the lid. Make sure it's very tight so that the water can't leak out.
5. Start shaking the jarShake it until your arms hurt. Then pass it to another friend and shake it until their arms go numb. Then give it to your little brother/sister or your kids and let them roll it around on the floor. This is how the rocks are smoothed out and polished. This will take a few weeks, or even longer, but if you stay committed it will be worth the effort!

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