Wednesday, February 25, 2015


Feb 2015

Jesus has undone something in me that I never really knew I had done up.

Packing for taking Jason to Fort Eustis was harder than I thought. Jason was shaving his wonderful beard off while I began to pack. And I started saying to God, "I don't wanna do this. I don't want to pack. I don't want to go. I don't want to face this. I don't want to do this!"

That still small voice, He quietly said, "You don't have to want to. Who ever told you that you had to want to do this? There were so many things I didn't want to do in my time on earth. When you don't want to do things, I'm right here. I will help you through the things you don't want to do."

And I lost it.

Jason came in to me crying, wondering what was wrong and I said through the tears, "Jesus told me I don't have to want to do this!"

Who did ever tell me that I have to want to do the tough things in life? Certainly wasn't Jesus. I mean, like He said... He did a lot of things He didn't want to do while He was here. Like put up with us.

"Jesus said, `You people today do not believe. You have turned away from God. How long must I be with you? How long must I put up with you? Bring the boy here to me.'" Matt 17:17

Did I just assume from the following verses that I had to do EVERYTHING I don't want to do with a smile on my face?

"Do all things without complaining and disputing, that you may become blameless and harmless, children of God without fault in the midst of a crooked and perverse generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world" Phil 2:14-15

"Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, in everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you." 1 Thess 5:16-18

I should not interpret from these verse to force myself be happy in all things.
Does Jesus require me to feel a way I do not? He asks me to seek Him out.
I should aim to not complain or be bitter. I should seek out the will of God by rejoicing in what He has done and being in prayer. I should count my blessings and rejoice in the many things God has done for me when it seems I have nothing to be grateful for.

In Matt 26, we see the turmoil of Jesus desiring to not do what He didn't want to do, but ultimately surrendering. "He bowed down with his face to the ground. He talked to God and said, `My Father, if it can be, let this cup of trouble pass by me. But do not do what I want. May what you want be done.'"

"The heart knows its own bitterness,
and a stranger does not share its joy"
Proverbs 14:10

Comparison is the thief of joy.

Guest Bedroom

quick little update of the guest room -

this room should have been taken care of a long time ago...
we didn't get to it for so long because originally we had an unexpected house guest who became an unexpected house mate staying in this room. we had wanted to get to it while she was there, but we were so busy and then you have to move all the stuff... and bleh...

so nothing happened in this room until she moved out, unfortunately.

but now things have happened.
Check out this crazy bed frame that we painted that we shouldn't have painted because the paint didn't take to it well so I praised God for the shabby chic movement so that I could make it look INTENTIONALLY distressed! hahahahaha

And, let's not forget about the guest bathroom floor that was redone just before Jason left. It was his last project before leaving *flings tear*

close up on that there tile.... it's also the same as the tile in our bathroom...
yep. pretty fancy. so there's that.
next will be to paint the cabinetry in the bathroom so it's actually good looking. not this nasty honey oak business. I have a thing against honey toned wood.